effects of global tourism: an essay - do not copy/generic title
The adverse consequences of global tourism - add a unique title
Exploration of distant places, (relevant vocabulary) along with their unique cultures and landmarks, (topical vocabulary) remains a favourable activity among a diverse group of (evaluative writing) people around the world. Having said that, (participle clause) there are also numerous drawbacks related to tourism, and thus, (compound sentences) the objective of this essay is to (indirect language) closely examine its pros and cons. (use formal language) benefits and drawbacks/advantages and disadvantages.
The introduction appropriately informs the reader about the essence of the essay.
- avoid common vocabulary (e.g pros and cons, try, help ) - use synonyms suitable for academic writing Formal & informal words
Firstly, (transitional devices) it is crucial to accentuate that (introductory phrases) there are various invaluable aspects of tourism, (formal style) with international understanding being one (passive voice) of the most evident ones. (topic sentence) Namely, (link sentences/ideas) each country is strongly linked to its specific cultural traditions, and owing to this, (avoid short sentences) travelling to unfamiliar locations can contribute to intercultural tolerance and reduce reduction of (use more nouns) stereotypes. Although some people may diverge from the same view and claim that (evaluative writing) it is possible to reach the same level of understanding through watching a documentary, it is clearly more beneficial to discover foreign habits in person.1 (complex ideas are communicated)
- use more nouns - formal written English uses nouns more than verbs Nouns in Formal English
Nonetheless, (transitional devices) one serious downside of tourism is (introductory phrases) its negative impact on the environment. (topic sentence) In some cases, (introductory phrases) reckless behaviour of certain travellers (relevant vocabulary) can result in damage or even destruction of natural habitats. (formal style/nouns) While the majority of tourists (suitable expressions) already avoids this approach and tries try to behave environmentally friendly, (topical vocabulary) every person should continuously seek room for improvement (suitable phrases) in their attitude towards nature.2 (complex ideas are communicated)
To put it concisely, (transitional devices) tourism is an engrossing hobby that can help us understand different nations, but it should be approached carefully.(passive voice) It is essential to be concerned (evaluative writing/indirect) about wildlife and nature since even one tourist’s disregard for the environment can degrade the overall life quality of other people on planet Earth.
In the summary paragraph, you should have explained which point (of the two commented points) is more important and explain why .
Content: 4/5
have you answered the question?
All content is relevant to the task. Target reader is almost informed.
- 1 international understanding- commented
- 2 the environment- commented
3 You should explain which point is more important, giving reasons in support of your answer- not commented
Communicative Achievement: 4/5
have you completed the task in the right sort of language?
The language register is consistently appropriately formal and evaluative (slips) Formal & Informal Style (video)
- avoid common vocabulary (e.g pros and cons, try, help ) - use more advanced synonyms suitable for academic writing Formal & informal words
- use more nouns - formal written English uses nouns more than verbs Nouns in Formal English
The candidate can communicate complex and simple ideas, depending on the context.
The organisation: 4-5/5
have you structured your writing properly?
The candidate demonstrated clear and coherent organization of ideas, utilizing the most appropriate and effective structure for the given task.
The candidate demonstrated clear and coherent organization of ideas, utilizing the most appropriate and effective structure for the given task.
- add a unique title
Language: 4/5
have you used a good range of grammar and vocabulary?
Vocabulary
There is a wide range of vocabulary, including less common lexis.
Grammar
There is suitable range of simple and more complex grammatical forms which are used with control and flexibility.
Errors, are insignificant and do not impede communication.
Uses a range of language, including less common lexis.
Sentences are sufficiently complex and varied (relative clauses, adverbial clauses, noun clauses, adjectival clauses and compound sentences)
The text uses semi-advanced and simple grammar with control and flexibility (passives, , modal forms and tense contrasts) but utilises a limited number of grammatical forms; use some of the following:
- correlative conjuntions (neither.. nor, both...and)read more
- inversion (not only/no sooner/seldom)read more
- conditionals (If it hadn't been.. )read more
- negative conditional (unless)see more
- past modals (might have left.., could have been.. )read more
- past perfectread more
Score: 17/20 Grade: C1
*We try to asses your assignments in accordance with the official guidelines. However, we cannot guarantee that you will receive this exact grade in the exam.
